Bad Dreams

This morning I woke up at 6:15 on the dot.
I woke up because I was hit in the head (in my dreams-not in real life!) and it freaked me out! I jolted really hard and woke up with chills all over!

So here's a brief version of the dream:
My sister was visiting me and Britt at our apartment.
We were all sitting on different parts of the bed just talking and it was getting later and later.
The way I was sitting made my legs "fall asleep" and they were getting all tingly.
All of the sudden I heard this loud bang on the front door.
Britt and Amy think its the neighbors slamming their door, but I get a really bad feeling and I think its something worse.
I try to get off the bed to go see whats going on, but because my legs have fallen asleep I fall face-first into the ground as my legs collapse like jello beneath me.
The banging thrashes again and I feel the vibration on the ground as I try to fumble my way towards the living room.
Right before I am able to make it to the door, it is flung wide open by 2-3 men who look like the police.
However, they are not the police. They are robbers.
I try to yell to warn Britt and Amy but its too late because our apartment is tiny, so the men have already made it to the bedroom.
Fear rushes over me, and I cannot defend myself.
I try to get up but one of the men hits me in the head with the same metal instrument that he used to knock down our door.
A stream of blood runs down my face, I black out.

END OF DREAM.
I jolt wide awake at 6:15am with chills covering my whole self.
I am terrified and I go check the locks on our door.
Then I pray...hard. I pray for God to wash me of this dream and of the fear it brought with it.
I pray that God would protect me and my family.
Then I think about buying a baseball bat. (Should there be any real-life intruders.)

Do you ever find yourself in situations like this?

"God please help me to trust you. God please protect my family/finances/etc."
But then we go and find the answer ourselves?

I trust You, but I'm buying a bat just in-case you don't exist or don't come through for me.

I trust You, but I trust myself more.

(If you're still reading at this point, thank you...I know this feels a bit lengthy.)

I'll try to wrap up by saying this:
God does exist. He is faithful to his promises, and we need to be able to fully put our trust in him.

His word says in Isaiah 12:2, " 2  “Behold, God is my salvation; I will trust, and will not be afraid;

for the Lord God is my strength and my song, and he has become my salvation.” 

I must trust without my guard up and know that God is in control.

I long to trust without any hindrances and any doubts. I pray that you would too.

Grace and Peace,
Brittany

Everlasting

Hello friends,
It's been awhile. I hope this post finds you well, and that you'd forgive me for taking so long to start writing again. On we go...

I've been thinking about the Fruits of the Spirit lately.
(Nicole's mom's tune, aka "Where Is Thumbkin")
..."Love joy peace, love joy peace,
 patience, kindness goodness,
 patience, kindness goodness,
 faithfulness, and gentleness,
 faithfulness and gentleness...self-con-trol.

I know I probably haven't developed these characteristics in their fullness at this point in my life, but I genuinely try to remind myself of them often. This week in particular has been a bit tiring for me, and I've just felt like BLAH. I'm apathetic, a bit sad, a bit worried, and just a hint of edgy.

I know my anxiety kicks in in times like this....a new season, frantically looking for a new job before the school year starts, new bills, new stress, and Britt having to work longer hours at his job. All of this just weighs on me, and its very hard for me to handle.

OK-back to the Fruits of the Spirit. One of them in particular stuck out to me today. Faithfulness.
To me, that entails being faithful in all aspects of my life. Being a faithful wife, friend, family member, employee, and most importantly being faithful to God.

In Greek, this word faithfulness is synonymous with trustworthiness.

I'll let that sink in.

The anxieties that I have and the burdens that I face are not simply mine to handle. I need to be faithful and trust that God will help me in every second of every day.

God has given me this life, these abilities, and my surroundings......does He not know what I face? Has he not promised His restoration for my soul? Indeed He has and will continue to. Indeed, he does not let the storm rage over me, but instead leads me beside still waters. Neither anxiety or fear are promised to follow me, but goodness and mercy will follow and cover me all the days of my life.

Even as I write this I know that God's love for us pours through His Word, and reassures me that my faithfulness is something of great importance in my walk with Christ.

What's even greater is that even when I lack in my faithfulness, God never lacks in His.

Faithfulness everlasting....

incredible.